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How a mountain came from a molehill

Well, This is awkward.

I like twitter, I like that it is punchy and direct and you can see what everyone is up to in the shortest amount of words possible. The only downside is that like most things in text, things can be misunderstood which is magnified when cutting a ten minute story into 140 characters or less. It leaves room for interpretation. Like, I don’t know perhaps some tweets about Qantas I made this morning, or Charlotte Dawson taking it in a way I didn’t expect.. they would be good examples.

It doesn’t usually matter, let people think what they want to think I say. Especially because everyone has an opinion on everything, I am the FIRST person to say, its crazy that we as celebrities get sent free stuff by the bucket loads when we should be the ones paying for it, it still trips me out. There are so many reasons why things celebrities say grind people, but would be fine to say by a 9-5 worker, duh they dedicate magazine pagers to those rippers, and how about the phone case going around of Kim Kardashian crying, would be so Sadistic if it were of the guy at your local IGA crying! . But not everything in the world revolves around people’s jobs. There are so many perks to being in the industry I am in, that it never feels ok to really complain about anything we get it good, I am always pinching myself. So its important to stay humble ESPECIALLY online, if you are famous or rich and you want to make any whiney type tweet, expect backlash I am not saying don’t do it, just don’t expect people to naturally be empathetic. I mean a famous person could tweet “ Oh my god there are maggots in my burger!!!” and let me tell you some people will still write “ What the hell, just because you are a celebrity you think you deserve to have a maggot free burger, you’ve changed man.” Its funny, well I think its funny and I think as people who live fairly privileged lives we deserve a bit of humbling. That is of course from people outside the industry, but when it comes from someone in the same business this rarely happens we don’t tend to judge each other as harshly because for the most part we all know a lot of us worked pretty damn hard to get there *(expecting backlash from definition of hard work)

However because the odds are stacked heavily in favor of a news outlet making this a story tomorrow I think I should fills gaps, STAT. Before I have to get a call from my mother asking why the paper says I was naked on a Qantas wing during a flight demanding to be served caviar while blocking all exit rows and demanding someone call Charlotte Dawson and tell her how wonderful I am.

Secondly I can see the nasty tweets starting around Charlotte and I don’t want to see it get out of hand again for her, I know I didn’t help by also reacting to her but I regret it and want us all to just treat how we would like to be treated.

 

So for those that cares. Basically in short, this morning I was flying from Coffs harbor to Sydney with my photographer, I was in an exit row, which happens to be at the front row of the plane, being one of those planes that is the size of a keying, the front of the plane and back of the plane are the same, one class. You can however close your eyes and pretend you’re on a private jet but at the end of the day I’m usually just happy I reach my destination as small planes scare me.

Let me please state that I have a real issue with people who are rude to anyone just trying to do there job (with the exception of parking ticket inspectors) I see it all the time and if I can help it I’ll always try to be extra chatty and nice with the server after, because you never really know how much words are effecting someone.

I digress, so the announcement just aired about turning off mobile phones. It wasn’t even 3 seconds before I hear “Excuuuuuseee me!!” and I looked up to see the hostess staring down at my friend she was already standing there when the announcement went ( that’s how small the plane is) but was talking in a tone that made me wonder if she was talking to a hearing impaired teenager who had been warned 10 times already to turn their phone off. I fly a lot and there is always some wanker (usually in business class) who will be asked so politely 10 times to power down and still have it on and always the hosts are beyond sweet never really straying from the words “ hello sir if you could politely turn that off now”. By that point I am usually ready to grab the guys phone! I don’t know how they do it, so I was kind of taken back by this approach but it wasn’t till my friend tried to warm it up and made a joke saying “sorry must have got distracted by a good Facebook post” as he shut it off straight away. To which she just said “Well it MUST have been good for you to IGNORE the request” sort of rolling her eyes and turning away. So ok, my friend could defend himself, but he’s just one of those super nice guys who wouldn’t hurt a fly and I am always a tad protective of my friends so I just said, nicely I might add, that she probably didn’t have to be so rude about it, just a simple reminder would have been fine. The other hostess came over before there was a response and said “ Will you put your feet off the wall” to me, now, my feet were not on the wall but yet I have a horrible habit in that front row of putting my feet on that magazine bit that holds the stuff and its attached to the wall, and of course, I will not rest my feet on that if Its brought to attention or if I catch myself doing it. I don’t recall adding ‘ 1 wall ‘ to my booking so I don’t deny she was right to ask although I have never been asked before. This would have been fine, the rude tone I could handle but then she said “would you do that in your house?”. To which I wanted to reply “Yes I do and my mummy lets me so nerrr and poke out my tongue” to match the roles I felt she was deciding for us.

Not that I do live at home, nor do I put my feet on my walls, and I would NEVER poke my tongue at my mother, but she was talking to us both like we were children incapable of travelling with out our parents. It was so weird, and it was preventing the plane from taking off so by now the plane of 50 over 50s were getting a bit annoyed. The women whispered about us for a while and then I thought we were taking off but then they came back and said to me“ I am sorry, I don’t feel comfortable with you sitting here, it’s the emergency exit and we need someone who will assist in an emergency”. 

I tried to laugh it off and let her know I would absolutely help in an emergency and not to worry. She said “move now please or get off the plane as maybe this isn’t the plane for you” ( whatever that means ) So I got up and as I did I said “ Do you really think if we were going to crash id stand in the way and kill the plane because I thought you were rude and she said “ I don’t know you so I have no idea” The whole plane can hear by now and no she didn’t mean “ I don’t know who you are or what you do for a job ( as charlotte seems to think is what upset me) she meant she didn’t know me as a person, but unless her best friends and family where on the flight, she didn’t know anyone on the plane.

We land I tweet it, I tweet praise to the airline who I use often, and just tell the story, not in a “ Oh my life is so hard help me, I cant survive” or “ don’t they know who I think I am” kind of way, I mean the plane was filled with older people I doubt any one knew who I was which is why it was so embarrassing because these older people were shaking their heads at me looking at my tattoos probably thinking we had been really rude or lit up a blunt or swore at these hosts or something.

It was half shock and half funny  “can you believe I was removed from the exit row because she thought I would allow a plane to go down all in the name of who was in the right or wrong.”

Times passes its on twitter people kind of tell similar stories or laugh, I move on and then….

Then Charlotte Happens. She tweets me two tweets, that to be perfectly honest I had to view about 6 times to actually confirm that what was happening was indeed happening. She had sent pictures of the tragedy in south Sudan where 11 civilians were killed as well as two Indian peacekeepers and a picture of them on the plane. As well as a response to my tweet to Julia Morris who had also had a similar situation before in which I said “ crap it must have been that tee I wore saying “everybody is going to die” maybe that’s why she moved me from the exit. Charlottes response was “Or a tee saying I’m a celebrity I can totes do rescue assist and stuff” further perpetuating that somehow anything I had mentioned had anything to do with me feeling entitled or wanting special attention.

Actually the truth was the opposite, I wanted the same treatment as everybody else, I am able bodied, young, strong and was in no way unable to help if needed. I was actually hugely embarrassed on the plane, I felt hurt and the way both women went about it really was like a punishment for saying they were rude. I pretended to sleep the whole flight because I felt so uncomfortable. I am a sensitive person, I can handle a lot but I am human and when people do nasty things I am aware they are happening and usually ill experience that for what it is and move on pretty quickly. I was over the flight thing by this point I wasn’t even going to complain to Qantas. I did however check Charlotte’s twitter to find she had tweeted my tweets to a twitter account called something to do with annoying complaining celebrities. Then started a conversation about me to a journalist saying “Oh dear poor Ruby had to be taken from front row, past the smelling salts” … “ What a tough time Ruby is having with Qantas” another read.

This is Charlotte, the woman who once photographed a bunch of pills in her hand saying “you won” to alleged online bullies before being admitted to hospital, the same Charlotte who has herself bullied young adults online but has turned it around into being quite vocal about how much it can effect someone and why not to do it.

I too work very closely with the Human rights commission and headspace, I am an anti-bullying advocate also and although I don’t always agree with the way Charlotte goes about her ways of tackling bullying, I am glad whenever someone is involved.  So why do I care? Why did I respond and not just get the phone out and get her info to chat privately…because I am emotional, sometimes silly too I suppose and I also just got in from LA so I am jetlagged and going to blame the jet lag on why I also BALLED MY EYES OUT LIKE A BABY over her rude tweets and how escalated this tiny situation got when a lovely lady name Kristen called from Qantas just to follow up on the incident, yes, I spent 25 minutes crying like a baby to a stranger on the phone after the tweet mess. Talk about being a SOFTIE!

I have a thicker skin than that but for me that was the absolute last straw I had for Charlotte. I do not want my tweets in any way to undo what I say and mean about bullying and online negativity. If the work I do around bullying were to be undone because people read us fighting online as bullying each other I would be devastated. It was bad form and I truly should have blocked her and ignored her little jabs.

The problem was that actually, I had had enough biting my tongue around Charlotte. She was one of my first friends when I got into the industry and since then in silence lets just say if there is anyone who has had me in tears from bullying or harsh words (Whilst being nice to my face) it has been her time and time again. Just weeks ago she tweeted that I looked beautiful in response to a photo, now I am a ‘Bitch’ who needs to grow up and get over myself?

The moral is, I am sorry if I didn’t react the right way in dealing with the situation and I hope this can end all the stuff that’s happening now as a result of Charlotte and I not setting the right example. 

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